Monday, December 5, 2016

WITHDRAWAL OF SALES ITEM

Dear readers,

Due to unforseen circumstances, we regret to inform you that the sales item offered in the blog post: ONE BOYFRIEND FOR SALE is currently out of stock.

Details regarding when we would receive a new shipment of the product is unclear. The blutackbuddy.blogspot.com team would like to apologize for any inconvenience and disappointment caused.

For readers that have already ordered the sold out product, blutackbuddy.blogspot.com hereby offers free copies of another of our best seller: The Social Cicada's guide to the Social Spectrum . Simply click the purchase link in the preview and provide the promo code "NO BOYFRIEND" to receive your free copy.

We thank you for your kind understanding and hope you would continue visiting blutackbuddy.blogspot.com for your future reading, purchasing and entertainment needs.

Deepest apologies and warmest regards,
The blutackbuddy.blogspot.com team

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Oh. My. God.

Discussing physics theories, studying for a PhD, or expressing your political views. Nothing makes one feel smarter than expressing their baseless views on religion. Is there a god? Is there an afterlife? Is there free will? Is there a meaning to life? Is global warming real? Is there a monster under your bed? Is your mother lying when she says you look good? Countless questions with millions of reasonable answers.......well, except that last question, we all know that.


So strap yourself up guys, because the prolific writer of blutackbuddy.blogspot.com is going to take you on a 5-part epic saga through his self-validated, self-affirmed views of the world. You may feel your opinions bubbling up, or your disagreement burning out of control. But fret not, my word is the truth. Anyone who disagrees with me will be punished, worse than the time your father flicked your dong for not listening to him.

On a higher power
The age-old question between atheists and the rest of the world - You can't prove that there is no god. No! You can't prove that there is a god either! If there is a god why is there evil? It doesn't matter whether there is a god, be a good person! No! We have to decide if there's a god! Why? So that someone can forgive you for killing your sister's pet hamster? Or so you can find some explanation and solace in how bad you look? Blah, blah blah....
Image result for blah blah blah roll eyes hands

Okay, I promise I'll stop with the ugly jokes soon (Just one more! You can do this!). But in all seriousness, I'm not interested in the philosophical repercussions of there being a higher power. 

Although, if you're deeply entranced by my views on life and must know, I just think that everyone should do good, not just for himself but for society, never regret or doubt, and always challenge the unknown. (Amen?) 

So yes, back to the bold header, is there, a higher power? I believe so. Although not one that is omnibenevolent, but more like, someone playing the Sims, with a really sweet computer (PC master race can I hear a hooyah?).  The classic argument that a being cannot be omnipotent and omniscient while being omnibenevolent, if there is so much suffering in the world.

Ever heard of dimensional theory? The one where the 0th dimension is a dot, 1st dimension - a line, 2nd dimension - a square, 3rd dimension - a cube, etc. We progress between each dimension by multiplying each dimension an infinite number of times, i.e. a line is made of an infinite number of dots. A being in the 2nd dimension, would never be able to see in the third dimension, and a being in the 3rd dimension (us) would never be able to see in higher dimensions.

However, we are still able to look and influence lower dimensions. Like when we draw on a 2D paper image. So that's my theory, our higher power, may very well be some kid, or maybe scientist (if that makes you feel better) in a higher dimension, that is experimenting or playing with us. He doesn't care or know everything happening in this little toy of his, how could he? We ourselves can look at a 2D picture or a dot but not understand what is happening in there.

You may argue that this higher being, could truly be good and benevolent. You could argue that while our higher power could be a kid with a toy, it could also be a well-educated, wise Tibetan monk that knows what he's doing. Perhaps like a skillful Sim player that isn't looking for entertainment, but to create something lovely. You could also argue, that you're not ugly (There! That's the last one!).

However, like I said, my word is the truth, and if you don't agree with me, you're an ass and I'm telling my mommy. 

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

The social cicada’s guide to the social spectrum.

Socializing. Strange thing isn’t it? You get thrown into a group of strangers you’ve never known, your mind flusters, your heart palpitates and time itself freezes. Do you, A, hastily retreat into a corner like a trapped animal. B, go forth and embrace your inner social demon. Or maybe you’re more of a C; a social germ that only cultures in the right conditions.

The array of different personalities in humanity is vast. A spectrum of personalities more diverse than the stars in the sky.        Sorry, what?

Types of personalities in the world = world population + multiple personalities = 7.4 billion plus about 20 million (Ceteris Peribus).
Number of stars in the sky = greater than 100 billion?

Okay, fine. The wide spectrum of different personalities in humanity is comparable to the size of your mom.

But I’ve got better things to do than to list the things in the universe bigger than your mom, no matter how short that list might be. Through careful research during my occasional social flooding as a Social Cicada, I’ve compiled, I’ve tested, I’ve ascertained and today I bring you snippets from the highly acclaimed book: The Social Cicada’s guide to the Social Spectrum!
Full version available online for only $12.99, get yours today here!
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The Social Cicada

Pharaoh Cicadas live underground for 17 years before emerging from the ground, loud and lively, looking to mate. In rare but disastrous occasions of flooding however, underground Cicadas are forced to emerge from the ground, seeking the solace of dry ground with many other insects that are likely to do the same thing. Similar to them, Social Cicadas live awkwardly with their head in the ground for extended periods of time until faced by a biblical flood of socialism that forces them to mingle. 

The Social Wallflower

Like the name, or as Emma Watson suggests, Social Wallflowers live their social life at the walls of a social event. Respirating, observing, and soaking in the light of a dim wall lamp. Social Wallflowers differ from Social Cicadas in two main ways similar to their zoological counterparts. Flowers typically grow together in a field and are bunched together into a nice bouquet of Social Wallflowers you see at a gathering, unlike the Cicada which sucks on tree roots like how a Social Cicada sucks his thumb at his social predicament. 
The other difference, is the difference in appeal of the Wallflowers vs. the Cicadas towards the Social Butterflies (Page 89)

The Social Butterfly

Universally known for their enchanting wings, the butterfly flutters from flower to flower everyday. Just like how a Social Butterfly floats between people, Wallflowers included. Everyone enjoys being with a Social Butterfly. No depiction of a beautiful garden is complete without frolicking buterflies. And no Disney princess can be truly named one without the ability to have a butterfly land on her fingers. 
But of course, by applying common principals of the food chain, one can infer that the Social Butterfly cannot be associated with certain entities for fear of becoming by-product of evolution. One common example of this would be their interactions with Social Cicadas. Beautiful, majestic creatures, just do not match well with those underground bottom feeders.

The Social Bumblebee

One common mistake to inexperienced social analyzers would be the difference between the Social Butterfly and the Social Bumblebee. Similar in many ways, butterflies and bumblebees are vital in the pollination of flowers, day after day, they go from flower to flower collecting nectar. However, if one were to get acquainted with a Social Bumblebee the difference would soon be evident. A bumblebee works its whole life collecting nectar to make honey for its queen, much like how a Social Bumblebee socializes as if he was answering to a higher power. No part of his existence would be meaningful if he does not attain gratification from his social targets. 
In addition, if you aren't a social bumblebee, try stealing honey from one of them, you'll soon realize that bees sting.

The Social Beast

A mythological animal, the Social Beast comes in many forms. A werewolf, a gargoyle, a vampire, what these all have in common is their insatiable thirst for human flesh. Much like the Social Beast's thirst for human interaction. As deep underground living in your parent's basement as you are, as hidden in the closet as your sexuality is, the Social Beast will hunt you down, he will find you, and he will, socialize with you. 

The Social Demon

If one were to be familiar with Revelation from the New Testament, one would know about how demons possess and influence people; maliciously propagating evil in proportions as extensive as the biblical plague. A Social Demon does just that, he engulfs entire communities, socializing, attaining followers much like the Whore of Babylon. No one is safe from Judgement Day where life ends, as we know it. No one except of course, the usual inhabitants of pestilence: disgusting, virulent insects, like the persistent Social Cicada. 
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Saturday, February 6, 2016

We accept the love we think we deserve.

Brad and Emily were doctors in their early 30s. Talented, aspiring and dedicated. The both of them were known for topping their classes and thrilled when they were offered to work under their world renowned boss, Dr Anthony.
Anthony on the other hand was in his late 40s. Eccentric yet incredibly intelligent, Anthony had a knack for sarcasm, often leaving many doctors that work under him speechless and doubting their intelligence.

The following story happens late into the night, in an old 80s cafe where the 3 colleagues, Brad, Emily and Anthony were seated around a small table having supper after a long day at the hospital. As they recalled past events, they laughed loudly and the atmosphere was just happy and comfortable.

EARLIER THAT DAY

A Caucasian male was rushed to the hospital after a severe car accident. Emily being the first doctor on the scene quickly accessed him by checking his pupils and breathing, the patient only responded by starting to seize. Hands flailing, legs kicking, the nurses panicked as the patient proved far too strong for them to hold down until Brad arrived to help stabilize him.

"Thank god someone's been working out", Emily smiled at Brad while attaching an IV drip to the patient.

Brad smiled back. "Nah, I'm just naturally strong."

The case of the Caucasian Male proved to be more complicated than just trauma from an accident as more symptoms surfaced along with the day. Doctors were stumped and nurses were just struggling to keep him alive. Anthony and his elite team of doctors were assigned to the patient and a furious brainstorming session ensued. Theories as to what the patient was suffering from were continuously pitched but rejected almost immediately by Anthony for being "simply not it".

It wasn't until two ideas were said, each by Brad and Emily, that Anthony responded, "Now that's what I'm talking about." Both theories were equally plausible but Brad and Emily didn't agree. Brad felt that pursuing Emily's theory would be a waste of effort, while Emily thought that Brad's theory was ridiculous. The heated debate was only ended when the doctors received notifications that the patient was having a heart attack.

A tough fight to keep the patient alive. The next time that Emily could sit down to rest was only at lunch time, and boy, was she exhausted.

"Guess who!" Emily was surprised as warm hands covered her eyes as she was taking a break in the doctors lounge.

It was her fiance, Rob, with a packet of lunch, "I was near and dropped by to make sure you don't skip your lunch again today."

Emily was pleasantly surprised, the couple embraced each other and were having lunch until Brad walked in.

"Hey, I don't think we've met, I'm Brad, Emily's colleague."

"Hi, I'm Rob, Emily and I are actually engaged." Rob replied as they shook hands. "Well, I'd love to stay and chat but I have to get to back to work soon. Emily told me that you have a tough case on your hands so help me make sure she eats her dinner yeah?"

As Emily left to send Rob off, Brad sat down to make a call to his girlfriend.

"Hey baby, I'm so sorry, I'm not gonna be able to come home tonight" ... "This patient, a real tough nut to crack, and I think that he might not live the night if we don't solve his case soon" ... "I love you too baby."


Reports from scans done earlier were done and the patient was brought into the radiology department for a CT scan by Brad and Emily. The room was dark and quiet; filled only with the sounds of machine whirring and segmented conversations between Brad, Emily and the patient.

"You know, I don't know why we're scanning his brain when the problem is obviously in his heart." Brad said, in hushed tones.

Emily replied, softly but mildly irritated, "In an accident, multiple seizures, and unconscious since he entered the hospital? He's obviously had some head trauma. Anthony probably just didn't reject your idea because he wanted to see if you would admit you were wrong before we prove anything."

"Then I guess we'll have to see who's wrong" Brad gave a sly grin.

"Hello??" a weak voice came from the speakers. The patient was awake. "I...I can't see...where am I? Why....ah...AHH....AHHHHH!!!" Moniters flashed and alarms buzzed as the patient went into shock from the pain of his burns from the accident. Brad called for backup while Emily rushed to find some pain medications. Screams emanated out of the CT room as nurses rushed to and fro, until Emily came back with an injection to knock him out.

Blindness. That was the last clue needed. The patient definitely had a neuro problem. Emily was right and once again the two doctors were in the scanning room finishing up the scan of the patients brain.

"I'm sorry, I was wrong. We could have gone home a long time ago, instead of staying past midnight debating."

"Nah, that's why we're a team isn't it? To throw ideas and stand for them, in case the next time you were right...." Emily spoke slowly and softly.

"Well, I'm lucky to have a colleague like you, you're smart, you're determined, and you...don't make fun of me when I'm wrong..." They both shared a laugh.

The room fell silent. It had been a long day at work. Both doctors looked at each other in the cold, dark room. Right then Emily could only think about how she's always felt that Brad was attractive, funny and intelligent. Brad on the other hand always felt comfortable communicating his beliefs to Emily. Their bodies were close. Faces closer. Emily leaned towards Brad, who was looking longingly at her lips.

"Supper?" The two were stopped abruptly just inches away from each others lips by Anthony who poked his head through the doors.



And so the three colleagues were having the late night supper. Past patients, ridiculous failures, other coworkers all kept them laughing until Anthony left to go home. The once comfortable atmosphere grew serious. Brad talked about his girlfriend while Emily talked about her fiance, their fingers touched and they looked into each others eyes.

They did finish that kiss ....... "What are we doing?"


Tuesday, January 26, 2016

The Best Of: POP MUSIC

What is your favorite genre of music? Are you a pop fanatic that put the Black Eyed Peas "I gotta feeling" on repeat and dances to LMFAO's Pary Rock Anthem? Or are you a rock head that head bangs to Living On A Prayer or Sweet Child O' Mine? Or perhaps your the kind who would lounge in the comfort of Collide by Howie Day or Photograph by Ed Sheeran? Oh, even quieter? Pachelbel's Canon? Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy?

I've never understood the need for someone to be a devout follower of a certain genre of music. You see, music seems to me more like a spectrum , one where the best songs of each genre represents each of the brightest colors. Colors that should not be appreciated like a plain solid wallpaper, but together; like a rainbow.

So without further ado, I would like to share with you guys, some of my favorite and, in my opinion, most respectable songs of all time. Bear in mind, that many of these songs might not be from a specific genre, (Due to the, spectrum thing I just explained.) and that a blog post would be insufficient to cover all my favorite songs, so this thread might go on for awhile.

Perhaps the easiest genre we can start with is Pop; where songs are judged less based on actual lyrics or vocal prowess but more off composing ingenuity and stage charisma.

Bad - The Cab



Written about having the desire for a girl that is "Bad" instead of just the normal stable relationship. And really, for any shy, shielded guy, don't we all want to try some of that "Bad" stuff? Bad by The Cab is my go-to get-in-the-mood song, and my liking for it not only comes from the ability of the band to perform this well live (on occasions), but also from their ability to compose songs that uniquely suit their lead singer, Alex Deleon's voice.

Uptown Funk - Bruno Mars



No list about the greatest songs ever made, can be complete without any mention of Bruno Mars. This guy, is a artistic legend. Not only is he able to churn out hits after hits of catchy songs, but he's also able to dance, and perform them live without a scratch to music quality. In fact, Adam Lambert's best song, Never Close Our Eyes, was written by the legend himself (and that's why Adam Lambert is not on this list). With Uptown Funk, Bruno shows just how profound his talent is with his ability to make a song that sounds like its from two different eras of music, yes he had help from Mark Ronson and all, but I'm sure if he didn't have talent, we wouldn't have heard all his other songs. I mean, just look at the audience engagement at his live performances.

One Republic

Special mention to one republic because all their songs are actual masterpieces composed by Ryan Tedder (one of the only few that can rival Bruno Mars in composing ability). Best hit (and one of my favorite song) by Gavin Degraw, Sweeter was helped composed by him, along with Not Over You. Ryan Tedder knows what pop culture wants, he knows what makes a great song, and accompanied by his gifted voice. Heres just my favourite one republic song. Skip to 1:08.



Hold My Hand - Jess Glynne



An up-and-coming artist, although I feel it might be too early to judge. Jess Glynne seems like the kind of artist who would definitely sky rocket in popularity. A strong unique voice, good ability to compose (from the many catchy singles we've heard from her and Clean Bandit), and eye catching stage presence, all traits of artists I become a fan of. Steadily improving, I smiled when she delivered her best performance of this song at the 2015 Jingle Bell Ball.

Now, I'm not sure if I'm actually allowed to use these videos, so if anyone woud want these videos taken down, please do let me know. Or if anyone would want their videos up here, well don't hesitate to comment I guess? That's it for Pop.